Goals Are Stupid-This Is Better

How many times have you set a fitness goal only to fail again and again? Or maybe you’re one of the few-someone who hit the goal, didn’t have any direction from there and regressed back to your former place yet again. Or perhaps goal setting isn’t even a thing you can wrap your head around and you are completely lost on what you want and how to begin.

HERE’S SOMETHING BETTER

One of my favorite books, The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F—K, taught me a skill that has served me well in life since. Not only has my training improved, but my life choices, who I choose to surround myself with, and my overall quality of life and health have improved. What is this magical method to this madness called life? It’s not easy, but it is simple. It’s defining your values.

DEFINING YOUR VALUES

According to Manson, the author of the previously mentioned book, we all have a set of values we live by whether we are conscious of them or not. Most of us are unconscious of these values and we developed them as a result of our experiences and environments at home, school, at work and in our relationships. These can be positive or negative, but they’re something we measure success by and many times they are outside of our control.

Here’s a simple example. If I am raised to believe that it is important to be popular and be liked by everyone, this is a value that is completely out of my control, and the moment someone doesn’t like me or I become unpopular due to a life change or a relocation my whole world could come crashing down if that’s how I measure success. Yet if I sit down to figure out what drives me to want to be that way and I develop a new value that says, I’m going to try and be respectful to everyone I come in contact with. Well, that’s totally within my control. I can take personal responsibility for that and if someone chooses not to like me it’s on them! I stuck to my values of being respectful so that is a success whether they like me or not. Taking personal responsibility for what drives you takes back your power.

The same is true for something like a weight loss goal. Maybe you’re not hitting your goal because you’re measuring it with the wrong value. What is driving you to create a weight loss goal in the first place? To look like that influencer on social media that you compare yourself to? That’s a terrible value and likely will not drive you to a successful completion of the goal. A better way is to value your own body because it’s the only one you’ve got and you’re blessed to have it, so let’s take great care of it. As you pursue a healthy, happy body-don’t worry about the rest. Aesthetics will follow. Have you ever seen a healthy body that doesn’t look great?

Did you ever notice people who have a near death experience due to health related disease tend to reach their fitness goals? The reason is their values tend to revolve around wanting to live long enough to see their children grow up, become successful, find love and have children of their own. Or they realize they want to contribute something to a community and they want to get healthy and stick around a little longer.

So you may have to do some work backwards. Dig a little deeper into your goals and find out what is driving them. Is the driver a bad value that will ultimately cause you to run out of steam never reaching or sustaining the goal? If so, how can you change the value into a positive driving force that will keep you on the path long term? Life is a marathon and we have to set ourselves up for longevity of success. Think of the long game-health.